author ● sojourner ● mother artist

author ● sojourner ● mother artist

Take Your Insecurities & Dance in the Rain

Interrupting 31 Days to Find Your Voice for a little soul revealing healing. Sometimes it’s the little revelations that hit you and you have to be brave and share.

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Take your insecurities and dance in the rain.I have this picture my son took of me dancing in the rain. It’s my internal insecurities that are rising up today. But it’s my outward insecurities that are keeping me from sharing this picture. I thought it’d be a good truth message to share,

“Take your insecurities and wash them away in the rain.”

But now, it’s my insecurities who are dancing.

Here I see just how very wide I am, how the rain has made my hair fuzzy, and the Indian in me casts my armpits gray no matter how clean shaven they are. My width is on full display here…there is no hiding the toil stress has take on my body.

My glasses, the marker of how blind I really am. Four eyes has never really been deemed pretty. Pretty is perfect, right? At least that’s the slaughter we’ve been led to believe.

If I share this people may assume the worst about me—and it may be true. They may rejoice in my faults and failings. They may laugh, adding fuel to the insecurities.

But, but—

If I am to be who I truly am. If I am to make art without mimicry, then this is me.

Ragged. Tired. Stressed.

To accept myself, to pursue true life even though my outward appearance may deny me acceptance, may invite ridicule.

This is me.

Vulnerable. Brave. Joy-pursuer.

If I want to be free, I must let go of my insecurities, let loose others opinions. I must break the chains one twirl in the rain at a time.

This is me. 

Freedom fighter. Storyteller. Beauty Seeker.

For I am large. I contain multitudes

and sometimes I dance in the rain.

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